I've Gone Ban Happy

You know what I heard? I heard that that Devil's concoction, High Fructose Corn Syrup, is bad for us. It's a killer. Oops, I mean a destroyer. Dang it. Well, in any case it's bad and it should be banned. You know, maybe we're onto something. Smoking's bad for us too. It causes cancer. Ban it. Drinking can be bad. Hello cirrhosis of the liver. Ban it. Porn is evil. It can cause blindness. Ban it. Cursing is bad. It hurts peoples feelings. Ban it. Oh, oh, oh. The old stand by violent video games and movies are differently bad for us. When I play Saints Row or watch Crank I always feel the need to go out and shoot someone. Ban them. Trans fat. The most vile stuff on the planet. Even the term should be banned. If not ban these things then tax/fine the hell out of them. See, we need to learn that we don't need these bad things. And if we can't learn that on our own, maybe we need a little nudging.