Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Random Thoughts XIX

I said God damn,
God, God damn the pusher man

Why do brownies taste so good?

How do headbangers do it? I thrash for more than 30 seconds and my neck is killing me for days

The butterflies will hatch their plan in October

You know you're getting old when you begin longing for the "good old days"

Why does a fresh cut lawn give a man such a sense of satisfaction

Five time a day is tearin' my ass up

Have you ever tried to stop a page from loading but it won't. You keep hitting the key over and over, but nothing happens. Then, you look down, and DUH, you're hitting F5 instead of Esc


Have you ever given anyone a dutch oven

Speaking of which. Have you ever ripped one that smelled so bad you were proud of it

Guys. Please stop using pictures of yourself without a shirt as a profile pic. You look stupid

Does anyone, besides me, still collect those state quarters

Why does it take so long for gas prices to go down when they can go up by 10 cents overnight

Seven of Nine, Tertiary Adjunct of Unimatrix Zero-One

Have you ever noticed that when you're sick you, for some reason, can't remember what it's like to not be sick? And for some guys, we don't think we'll ever be well again

Don't want me any of that harder stuff
Don't need it any more
I'm in Hell and I'm sinking fast
And I don't need no cure

You ever sneeze and lose what comes out? You know it didn't fall to the ground because you didn't see it fly. It's not on your shirt, arm or hand. Then, a week later, you find it in your mustache

Why does meatloaf taste better the next day

Sammy Hagar is better as a solo artist than with Van Halen

5 hours in a day. That would be awesome

Why do some men still insist on using the terms "babe" or chick"? I mean, "sweetcheeks" is so much better

I love Whites who can "sympathize with the plight of minorities"

Have you ever bought an album based on just one song? Sometimes it pays off and sometimes it doesn't

Do you believe in miracles? You should. How else do you explain Will Ferrell's success? It sure ain't talent.

Why is radio better at night than during the day

Ladies, do you want to know how really perverted men are? I'll tell you. When we see even a picture of a woman in a skirt, we'll try to move our heads around to see if we can see anything. Or is that just me?

I love bologna sandwiches