In Case You Missed It

Oh my God. It's happened again. A Pennsylvania man shoots himself while driving. Once again, Gun Rule #1: Don't Put Gun Near Family Jewels.

The turkey's are mad has hell, and they're not going to take it anymore. Wild turkey's in Maine fight back against the genocide known as Thanksgiving. Another funny part about this story? Look at this woman's profession. Priceless.

A Taiwanese woman has filed a protection order against her husband. Why? Did he beat her? No. Did he threaten her life? No. He told her ghost stories.

Kick-boxing orangutans have been flown back home to the wild. Am I the only one who sees the danger in this? We've seen turkey's fight back. Do we really want an army of hairy Chuck Norris's running wild?

Porn helps Panda's in China get busy. There's a tasteless "bamboo" joke to be made but I won't do it.

First thing that I said when I read the headline? What the hell!?!?!

Canadian P.M., Stephen Harper, and interim Liberal leader, Bill Graham, try to out "you're gayer than me" each other. And I thought our politicians were bad.

A Monk in Thailand cuts off his little Buddha because he got excited during meditation. Blow yourself up for Allah or cut your member off for Buddha. Glad I'm agnostic.

And the winner of this weeks Darwin Award is Paula Davis of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. Ms. Davis likes the hooch. In fact she likes it a little too much. See, she'd gotten herself arrested for DUI. So she went to court to plead guilty to the charges. But she didn't show up to court exactly 100% okay. More like 100-Proof. She showed up drunk for her DUI hearing. You go girl. You wear that Darwin Award with pride.