Tuesday, January 18, 2005

Pandering for votes, NYC Mayor Michael Bloomberg yesterday compared Rev. Al Sharpton to civil rights icon Rosa Parks. Rosa Parks made a statement by sitting in the front of a bus when it was illegal for a black to do so. Can anyone name one thing Shaprton has done that even comes close to that?

I was sitting and watching The Blue Collar Comedy Tour lastnight, and Jeff Foxworty was telling some of his redneck jokes and I thought I might share some of my favorites with you. See how many make you say, "Hey, that's me".

You Might Be A Redneck If...
...you think watching professional wrestling is foreplay
...you think a Volvo is part of a woman's anatomy
...you've got more than three cousins named "Bubba". I'm the Bubba in the family
...your favorite entree is Spam barbecued on the grill
...your child's first words were, "Attention K-Mart shoppers!"
...your whole family is Democrats except little Mary. She got to readin'
...you've ever taken reading material into an airplane restroom
...you've ever stood in line to have your picture made with a freak of nature
...you think potted meat on a saltine is an hors d'oeuvre
...you can't visit relatives without getting mud on your tires
...you honest-to-God think women are turned on by animal noises and seductive tongue gestures
...you have a Hefty Bag for a passenger-side window
...your favorite beer company cannot afford to advertise
...you time your belches to achieve a personal best
...you think Campho-Phenique is a miracle drug
...you clean your house with a water hose
...you've ever stolen toilet paper
...you've ever talked back to characters on the movie screen
...you have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say cool whip on the side

The ones in green all apply to me.
The Only Thing Necessary For Evil To Triumph
Is For Good Men To Do Nothing