Saturday, December 30, 2006

I Need A Favor

As you read in the post below, I've been having some trouble with my connection. But I'm beginning to wonder if that's the real problem. Because some sites will load just fine. Like Best Buy, Yahoo, Barnes & Noble and IMDB. While some won't. Like Amazon, Netflix and TinyPic. Could someone log on to those four sites and see if they load for you. I want to know if it's just me or what, because it's strange that some load fine and others don't. I was conversing with someone I know in China and he's having trouble with his connection because of the recent earthquake that hit the region and I'm wondering if maybe that could be causing the problem. A far reach, I know, but worth a shot.
First off, I've been having some trouble with my ISP which has made loading page king of iffy. Sometimes I can and sometimes I can't. So for those of you on the WHB, if you don't get the post next week it's because I couldn't get it out.

Anyway, I've been tagged by Greta so I now have to tell you five things you may not know about me.

1. I'm afraid of the dark. I sleep with my stereo on that has a bright blue light on it.
2. I can pop my knuckles just by closing my fists.
3. I can't swim. When I was younger I almost drowned in the lake and ever since then I won't go in water deeper than my chest.
4. I have gray hair. Have ever since the 10th grade.
5. I apparently sound like a woman on the phone. In person I have a fairly deep voice, so go figure.

I tag John K, Za & Deo.
Friday, December 29, 2006

Saddam Is Dead

Now rot in Hell, or what ever it's called in the Muslim world.
Thursday, December 28, 2006

A Picture's Worth A Thousand Words

Here's a link to a picture of John Kerry's recent trip to Iraq to meet with the uneducated troops there. In the picture, Kerry is eating breakfast with the troops, only none of them seem to want to sit with him. Gee, I wonder why. It kind of reminds me of the picture that came out a year or so ago where the soldier who was posing with Hilary Clinton had his fingers crossed. A sign of distress.

Credit: Here, There And Back Again & John K
Wednesday, December 27, 2006

Wednesday Heroes

Every once and awhile I'll do a Wednesday Hero that doesn't profile a single soldier. Sometimes it's been two or three from the same unit, sometimes it's been an entire group of soldiers like the Navajo Code Talkers. I even did an organization once, Operation Iraqi Children. This weeks Wednesday Hero is one of those sometimes. This weeks Wednesday Heroes are the parents of soldiers.

These people sacrifice just as much, if not more, than the soldiers themselves. They, in many cases, are having their babies leave home for the first time in their lives. While most parents only have to adjust to them moving a few miles away or going off to college, these Blue Star Parents have to watch their children go off to a very dangerous situation and can only hope and pray that everything will turn out okay. I don't have children of my own, so I can't even imagine what that is like. We have a few Blue Star Parents in the blogroll, so to them, and every parent of a Hero, I tell you we all stand with and support you and your family.
There's a site that everyone should check out if they haven't already. Blue Star Mothers Of America.

These brave men and women sacrifice so much in their lives so that others may enjoy the freedoms we get to enjoy everyday. For that, I am proud to call them Hero.
We Have Every Right To Dream Heroic Dreams.
Those Who Say That We're In A Time When There Are No Heroes, They Just Don't Know Where To Look

This post is part of the Wednesday Hero Blogroll. If you would like to participate in honoring the brave men and women who serve this great country, you can find out how by clicking here.
Tuesday, December 26, 2006

Santa Arrested, Repost

I hope everyone had a great Christmas and that you didn't eat too much. I posted this last year and felt it was so good that I couldn't pass up doing so again this year.

Dec. 26, 7:00 AM (CT)

SAN FRANCISCO (RWRM News) - Santa Clause was arrested early Monday morning by San Francisco Police at the behest of the ACLU. The jolly fat man known the world over for bringing presents to good little boys and girls was arrested Christmas morning on charges of instigating a riot when citizens of San Francisco began to burn cars and destroy private property upon hearing Mr. Claus reciting, "Ho, Ho, Ho, Merry Christmas".

"I was incensed" said one woman. "How dare he say something like that. Chri... Chris... I can't even say it. All I know is it offended me and my children".

Anthony RomeroSaid Anthony Romero, ACLU Executive Director, "This is a great day for freedom. This Mr. Claus has been going around the world spreading his religious hatespeech far too long. We will not sit idly by and let people say the 'C' word like this. It must be stopped. We plan to take this matter to the highest court in the land. Mr. Kringle must be stopped".

After hearing about the arrest children all over the world began to cry. Mrs. Sarah Stephens, mother of three, said "We depend on Santa. We can't afford to buy our children toys for Christmas and he wasn't able to make it to our house this year. What are we to do now?" Upon hearing this, Mr. Romero was quoted as saying, "Too bad. Contact the government. That's what they're there for. To take care of us".

Mr. Kringle was said to be just finishing up at an orphanage when the police nabbed him.

Santa Mugshot"This is bullshit," said Santa about his arrest. "I've never heard of such trumped up charges in my life. This is just another example of the Neo-Libs trying to force their views on the rest of the country. Kids, don't worry, Santa will beat this. MERRY CHRISTMAS...MERRY CHRISTMAS".

Mr. Kringle's lawyer, Alan Thomas, rushed to his defense. "Mr. Claus is innocent of all charges", he said during a press conference. "The ACLU and the city of San Francisco are trying to silence a man for doing only one thing. Exorcising his first amendment right. This travesty of justice will be rectified. Christmas will not be stopped". Upon saying that Mr. Thomas was then arrested himself.

"This has gotten out of hand", said one man who wishes to remain anonymous for fear of reprisal. "This whole anti-Christmas sentiment that's sweeping though this country has gone too far. I was too scared to even put up lights this year. My children were threatened by their school mates just last week for bringing candy canes to class".

Ms. Heather Fong, San Francisco Chief Of Police, refused to return our calls. But Officer Thomas Hall said, "That old man sure can put up a fight. He took three of our best before we were able to subdue him".

Blitzen and Comet were said to inconsolable after the arrest. But Dasher had this to say, "Santa will not be in jail for long. I guarantee that. This injustice will not stand. FIGHT THE POWER!!!".
Monday, December 25, 2006

Merry Christmas

I hope everyone has a safe and happy Christmas. I hope Santa brings you everything on your list and the family doesn't drive you too crazy. I will see you all again on Tuesday.

A U.S. Marine's Christmas
'Twas the night before Christmas, he lived all alone,
In a one-bedroom house made of plaster and stone.
I had come down the chimney, with presents to give
and to see just who in this home did live.

As I looked all about, a strange sight I did see,
no tinsel, no presents, not even a tree.
No stocking by the fire, just boots filled with sand.
On the wall hung pictures of a far distant land.

With medals and badges, awards of all kind,
a sobering thought soon came to my mind.
For this house was different, unlike any I'd seen.
This was the home of a U.S. Marine.

I'd heard stories about them, I had to see more,
so I walked down the hall and pushed open the door.
And there he lay sleeping, silent, alone,
Curled up on the floor in his one-bedroom home.

He seemed so gentle, his face so serene,
Not how I pictured a U.S. Marine.
Was this the hero, of whom I'd just read?
Curled up in his poncho, a floor for his bed?

His head was clean-shaven, his weathered face tan.
I soon understood, this was more than a man.
For I realized the families that I saw that night,
owed their lives to these men, who were willing to fight.

Soon around the Nation, the children would play,
And grown-ups would celebrate on a bright Christmas day.
They all enjoyed freedom, each month and all year,
because of Marines like this one lying here.

I couldn't help wonder how many lay alone,
on a cold Christmas Eve, in a land far from home.
Just the very thought brought a tear to my eye.
I dropped to my knees and I started to cry.

He must have awoken, for I heard a rough voice,
"Santa, don't cry, this life is my choice
I fight for freedom, I don't ask for more.
My life is my God, my country, my Corps."

With that he rolled over, drifted off into sleep,
I couldn't control it, I continued to weep.

I watched him for hours, so silent and still.
I noticed he shivered from the cold night's chill.
So I took off my jacket, the one made of red,
and covered this Marine from his toes to his head.
Then I put on his T-shirt of scarlet and gold,
with an eagle, globe and anchor emblazoned so bold.
And although it barely fit me, I began to swell with pride,
and for one shining moment, I was Marine Corps deep inside.

I didn't want to leave him so quiet in the night,
this guardian of honor so willing to fight.
But half asleep he rolled over, and in a voice clean and pure,
said "Carry on, Santa, it's Christmas Day, all secure."
One look at my watch and I knew he was right,
Merry Christmas my friend, Semper Fi and goodnight.

Friday, December 22, 2006

The Rat Shows His Face Again

Zawahri to Democrats, You're Welcome.

This was sent along by a member of the Wednesday Hero Blogroll, and I thought I should share it. It's almost 300K, which is why I've linked to it rather than display it. 300K for us dial-up dinosaurs is murder.

But it's good to see that, even under stress these guys are under, they're still able to have some fun.


No Mas Raids

Well, Senorita Rosales, were the government throwing illegals into concentration camps, starving them, conducting horrific experiments and killing them en mass, then I would agree with you.

This is just more scare tactics by people who support illegal immigration to try and get the American people to support it as well. When all else fails, resurrect Hitler.

Have A Very Merry Festive ACLU Christmas Seasonal Celebration

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house,
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there.
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from my bed to see what was the matter.

There was Santa again, on his annual journeys,
Ensnared in a group of eight tiny attorneys.
They looked pretty grim and they threatened to sue,
So we knew in a flash--"It's the ACLU!"
They paid us no heed but went straight to their work,
Handcuffing poor Santa, then said with a smirk:
"This is secular airspace, we can't have a saint
Flying our flight paths--we need some restraint.

A sleigh full of toys is OK, we suppose,
But faith-based incursions we've got to oppose."
Litigation on Christmas is something we dread,
So we nestled our children all under their bed.

The Grinch doesn't scare them, and Scrooge they see through,
But what kids are prepared for the ACLU?
The reindeer were shackled as a further incitement,
Then the lawyers unpackaged a 12-count indictment.

"Merry Christmas to all!" they just had to foreclose
(Though they had no complaint about all the "Ho, ho's").
One lawyer objected to Santa's red clothing.
"It's religiously tainted," he said with some loathing.
"Poinsettias (the red ones) everybody must note, are
A church-state offense in St. Paul, Minnesota!"

Santa's climb up each chimney (one lawyer made mention)
Is a symbolic reference to Jesus's Ascension.
And the reindeer, of course, recall the Apostles,
And those who deny it are nothing but fossils.

These lawyers had labored at neighborhood schools,
Making Christmas extinct there as part of the rules.
Praise Kwanzaa or Ramadan--they think it's quite splendid,
But say "Merry Christmas" and you could get suspended.

Our children, God bless them, don't get or recall
Why "inclusiveness" doesn't include them at all,
Why diversity theory (as the lawyers insist) must
Require the annual quashing of Christmas.

In Canada, home of post-everything living,
Now "The 12 Days of Christmas" are "The 12 Days of Giving."
Christmas trees aren't part of their season at all.
They buy "multicultural trees" at the mall.

At a hospital (Catholic) the staff is ashamed
To use the word Christmas, so their tree is misnamed
As a "care tree," though some would prefer "tree of life."
(Why not "tall lit-up flora" to avoid any strife?)

Australians were told they should have no compunctions
Calling parties at Christmastime "end-of-year functions."
The idea is to make Christmas somehow unmentionable,
A tactic I think of as wholly contemptible.

Instead of "White Christmas," they will probably sing
"I'm dreaming of a snow day some time in pre-spring."
Here's my suggestion, a harsh one I fear,
Why not call Christmas "Christmas"? (It's just an idea.)

And finally, my Christmas card to all my readers. In the past I've only sent it to those I'm closest with, but I wanted to give this to everyone this year. Enjoy.
Thursday, December 21, 2006

Rosie vs. Donald Trump

I'm sitting her at my computer and I'm listening to Donald Trump on FNC talking about Rosie O'Donnell. If you didn't hear this, I'm sure you will hear about it soon. He just went off on her. I've never heard anyone rip someone a new one like that in some time. He went after her with both guns blazing. "Rosie's an ugly person. Both inside and out". "I'm sure Rosie would like to spend a few minutes with Miss Universe". Talking about the failure of her magazine and so much other stuff I can't even remember it all. It's about time someone put that softbrain dumbass in her place. She's been spewing hatred and ignorance for years, but since she's been on "The View" she's totally lost it. Kelly Ripa is a homophobe, Christians are terrorists, "ching chong ching chong" and now this.

What is the spirit of Christmas?

A simple enough question. Right? So then, why can't I answer it? Why can't I define what the Christmas spirit is? So I ask you, what is the spirit of Christmas?

Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Wednesday Hero

Sgt. Roy A. Wood
Sgt. Roy A. Wood
47 years old from Alva, Florida
ODA 2092, Company C, 3rd Battalion, 20th Special Forces Group (Airborne)
January 26, 2005

Sgt. Roy A. Wood, a Special Forces medical sergeant, was fatally injured when the vehicle he was riding in was involved in a traffic accident near Kabul, Afghanistan, during a return convoy from Qalat to Bagram Air Base.

His 24-year military career with the Army Reserve and Army National Guard was distinguished and unique. After receiving a commission as a second lieutenant in 1979, he was first assigned to the Army Reserve’s 421st Quartermaster Company (Light Airdrop Supply).

While assigned to the 421st, he received training as a quartermaster officer, a parachute rigger, and participated in both basic airborne and jumpmaster courses.

In January 1982, he left the 421st to begin an association with U.S. Army Special Forces that would last until, and beyond, his death.

His first SF assignment was to the Army Reserve's 11th Special Forces Group (Airborne) at Fort Meade, Md., where he served in the 3rd Battalion’s Company A as the detachment executive officer for Operational Detachment-A 1175.

In May 1983, he became Detachment Commander for ODA 1175 after returning from the Special Forces Detachment Officer Qualification Course.

In October 1984, he left ODA 1175 to become the Company Logistics Officer.

He served in a variety of positions at the 11th SFG over the next 11 years, including operations officer and support company commander.

After four years at USSOCOM, he served a year with the Army Reserve’s 73rd Field Hospital in St. Petersburg, Fla., before switching from the Reserve to the Army National Guard and renewing his association with Special Forces.

He was assigned to 3rd Bn., 20th SFG in December 2001, where he served for a year as the Battalion Surgeon, supervising medical coverage of three Special Forces companies and one support company.

In December 2002, he resigned his commission to become a Special Forces medical sergeant on Operational Detachment-A 2092, Co. C, 3rd Bn., 20th SFG.

He, with ODA 2092, was mobilized in July 2003 in support of Operation Enduring Freedom.

At the time of his death, he was pending appointment as a Special Forces warrant officer, a position in which he would have served his team as an assistant detachment commander.

During his service, he received the Army Commendation Medal, the Army Achievement Medal, the Army Reserve Achievement Medal with Silver Hourglass device, the National Defense Service Medal, the Army Service Ribbon, the Basic Parachutist badge, the Parachute Rigger badge, the Ranger tab and the Special Forces tab.

Sgt. Roy Wood leaves behind a wife and two children.

These brave men and women have given their lives so that others may enjoy the freedoms we get to enjoy everyday. For that, I am proud to call them Hero.
We Have Every Right To Dream Heroic Dreams.
Those Who Say That We're In A Time When There Are No Heroes, They Just Don't Know Where To Look

This post is part of the Wednesday Hero Blogroll. If you would like to participate in honoring the brave men and women who serve this great country, you can find out how by clicking here.

Blogs Partcipating In Wednesday Hero

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

We're Here, We've Got Gears, Get Use To It

A new report from the U.K. says that in the next 50 years sentient machines will have the same rights as humans.

So I won't be able to beat my robot butler when he brings me the wrong drink? Damn it all to hell. First the kids now this. What's next, our grandparents? Crap. And I suppose they'll want to be called "Mechanical Americans" as well.



Blogger has been making some changes over the past few months. One of the new ones I really like. I, as the author of this blog, no longer have to mess with the word verification of my own blog while all you suckers do. HA-HA. But I still have to when I leave a comment on another Blogger blog.


Laura Bush Has Skin Cancer

I just wanted to give my best to the First Lady.

Monday, December 18, 2006

John Kerry: Terrorist Lover For Life

Sen. John "Frankenstein" Kerry is once again going to meet with the government of enemies of the United States to give aid and comfort.

We all know about his 1971 actions in Paris, France. Seriously, this man has betrayed his country time and time again. Arrest him and charge him with treason.

Sunday, December 17, 2006

Merry Christmas Countdown 5

In Case You Missed It

An elderly couple welcomed a couple of intruders into their home with a beating and a shotgun.

Introducing the 11-year-old college sophomore.

The University Of Nebraska is spraying their evergreen trees with fox pee to prevent people from cutting them down to use as Christmas trees

The German government is considering jail time for video game makers who are found guilty of "cruel violence on humans or human-looking characters".

A single mom in Philadelphia had her Christmas presents stolen by thieves.

Strange things pets have swallowed

An Israeli satellite company has dropped BBC for al-Jazeera.

No runner-ups this week. Just two winners.

A Kansas man called the cops to report that his stash of pot had been stolen.

And Austrian bank robber was caught after he left his bankcard behind after robbing the bank.

No jokes this week. So, to make up for that I offer you Triumph: The Insult Comic Dog. Just pick your video. They're all good. FOR ME TO POOP ON!!!. That damn dog cracks me up. I wanted the Canadian incident, but couldn't find it.
Saturday, December 16, 2006

Life Lesson #10

If you can't handle spicy food anymore, don't eat it.
This Was Brought To My Attention By John K

Incoming U.N. Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon seems to be getting off to a great start. When asked a question during a news conference about Ahmadinejad's statements about the Holocaust and Israel being wiped off the map, Ki-moon said
Denying historical facts especially on such an important subject as the Holocaust is just not acceptable.

Nor is it acceptable to call for the elimination of states or people
Let's hope this isn't a one off show of a spine.
Friday, December 15, 2006

Wise Sage Of The Day

"In the long history of the world, only a few generations have been granted the role of defending freedom in its hour of maximum danger. I do not shank from this responsibility - I welcome it. I do not believe that any of us would exchange places with any other people or any other generation. The energy, the faith, the devotion which we bring to this endeavour will light our country and all who serve it -- and the glow from that fire can truly light the world.

And so, my fellow Americans: ask not what your country can do for you - ask what you can do for your country.

My fellow citizens of the world: ask not what America will do for you, but what together we can do for the freedom of man."
John F. Kennedy
When I started Wednesday Hero little over a year ago I never realized what would become of it. I was content with it just being on my one little blog with it's 20-30 readers. Then Greta asked me to come aboard and post with her. And WH began to appear on two blogs. Perfectly fine with me. Fast forward about a year and Greta then suggests that I take WH to the masses and start the Wednesday Hero Blogroll. I was a little wary at first, but I came to think it was a pretty good idea. Fast forward 3-1/2 months and the blogroll is up to 40 blogs, counting this one and Hooah Wife, and the problems have began. Massive system failure with last weeks post and differing ideas on things I've tried. And the more this thing grows the more situations will arise that I will have to deal with. I'm not a leader by nature. I'm a follower. But being that this is my thing, I will have to step up and at least look like I know what I'm doing. Now, I don't expect this will become the next Stop The ACLU, nor do I want it to be, but it has grown beyond what I thought it would. It's a little overwhelming at times but it's sort of gratifying to see something that I did become a small success.

If I hadn't already had gray hair before this, I would now.
Thursday, December 14, 2006

Merry Christmas Countdown 4

First it was the soldier getting spit on at the airport, now one gets a death threat.

SSG. Stephen A. Carey of the 101st Airborn recieved a message via his MySpace page from some anti-war nut, complete with a Hugo Chavez hero and boycott Israel pictures, which read:
you take pride posing in uniform, why don't you come here big fat mother fucker i will burn your fucking flag in that fagot face you have you're always messing with weaker ones, come here to get our water fucker! we're waiting! i will cut your throat with my own hands! you have no balls bunch of kids with guns. i hope juba snip you before i get you. it'd be less painful.
Mitt Romney's stock has just shot up in my eyes. It's about damn time someone did this. I mean, for the love of God, it's the police's job to uphold the law.
Wednesday, December 13, 2006

The United Nations Continues To Turn A Blind Eye To Darfur

Yid With Lid has a great post up about the U.N. "Human Rights" Council's refusal to condemn the Sudanese government over their continued genocide against the people of Darfur in their latest, in a long line of, toothless resolution. I hear and see people, namely rich, white American celebrities, criticize the Bush administration and the U.S. government time and and time again for not doing enough to help, and all rightly so may I say, but little if anything is said about the U.N.'s handling of the situation. Or lack there of. Isn't this their job?

Wednesday Hero

Navy Hospital Corpsman 3rd Class Travis L. Youngblood
Navy Hospital Corpsman 3rd Class Travis L. Youngblood
26 years old from Surrency, Georgia
Regimental Combat Team 2, 2nd Marine Division, 2nd Marine Expeditionary Force (Forward)
July 21, 2005

Elmer "Mo" Youngblood wasn't sure why his sailor son wanted to leave relatively safe duty aboard a ship to be a combat medic in Iraq.

"For some reason or another, he wanted to be a corpsman," Youngblood said of his son, Petty Officer 3rd Class Travis Levy Youngblood.

He was a medic with a Marine unit in the Iraqi town of Hit when he was hit by an IED.

"I was tickled to death with him being in the Navy," Elmer Youngblood, a former Navy man, said from his home in Surrency, in southeast Georgia. "I wasn’t too happy when he basically volunteered to go over there, but it was his choice."

Travis Youngblood grew up mostly in Virginia. He attended Appling County High School after his father moved there in the 1990s. Surrency is listed as his hometown on his Navy enlistment papers and he and his father enjoyed fishing and hunting together there.

His wife, Laura, also served in the Navy. She left the service and lives in Long Beach, N.Y.

The couple has a four-year-old, now five, son, Hunter Youngblood, and Laura Youngblood was pregnant with the couple's second child at the time of his death.

These brave men and women have given their lives so that others may enjoy the freedoms we get to enjoy everyday. For that, I am proud to call them Hero.
We Have Every Right To Dream Heroic Dreams.
Those Who Say That We're In A Time When There Are No Heroes, They Just Don't Know Where To Look

This post is part of the Wednesday Hero Blogroll. If you would like to participate in honoring the brave men and women who serve this great country, you can find out how by clicking here.

Blogs Partcipating In Wednesday Hero

Tuesday, December 12, 2006

Merry Christmas Countdown 3

Grandma got run over by a reindeer.
Walking home from our house Christmas eve.
You can say there's no such thing as Santa,
but as for me and grandpa we believe.
She'd been drinking too much eggnog,
and we begged her not to go.
But she forgot her medication, and she
staggered out the door into the snow.
When we found her Christmas morning,
at the scene of the attack,
she had hoof-prints on her forehead,
and incriminating Claus marks on her back.

Grandma got run over by a reindeer.
Walking home from our house Christmas eve.
You can say there's no such thing as Santa,
but as for me and grandpa we believe.

Now we're all so proud of grandpa,
He's been taking this so well.
See him in there watching football,
drinking root beer and
playing cards with Cousin Mel.
It's not Christmas without Grandma,
All the family's dressed in black
and we just can't help but wonder:
Should we open up her gifts,
or send them back?
Send them back!!

Grandma got run over by a reindeer.
Walking home from our house Christmas eve.
You can say there's no such thing as Santa,
but as for me and grandpa we believe.

Now the goose is on the table
and the pudding made of fig
and the blue and silver candles
that would just have matched
the hair on grandma's wig.
I've warned all my
friends and neighbors
better watch out for yourselves,
they should never give a license
to a man who drives a sleigh
and plays with elves.

Grandma got run over by a reindeer.
Walking home from our house Christmas eve.
You can say there's no such thing as Santa,
but as for me and grandpa we believe.

Death to The Dictator

These students may want to watch their backs. They could start to disappear. Dictators like Ahmadinewhatever don't like to be criticized. Just look at Kim Jong Il and Vladamir Putin.

Way To Pick 'Em, Nancy

Boy, Nancy Pelosi sure knows how to pick them. Jack Murtha and now Reyes. Getting off to a great start. Can't wait for the next two years.
Monday, December 11, 2006

Wise Sage Of The Day

"Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes."
Oscar Wilde
Where do you think you're going? Nobody's leaving. Nobody's walking out on this fun, old-fashioned family Christmas. No, no. We're all in this together. This is a full-blown, four-alarm holiday emergency here. We're gonna press on, and we're gonna have the hap, hap, happiest Christmas since Bing Crosby tap-danced with Danny fucking Kaye. And when Santa squeezes his fat white ass down that chimney tonight, he's gonna find the jolliest bunch of assholes this side of the nuthouse. HA!
Sunday, December 10, 2006

Sunday Funny

In Case You Missed It

Virginia Governor Tim Kaine has been getting some pretty creepy calls. From ghosts. Have you seen that episode of The Twilight Zone where that old woman kept getting calls from her dead husband? Life imitating art.

This was almost the runner-up for the Darwin Award. An Omaha, Nebraska teen takes a gun to school and accidentally shoots himself in the thigh.

A German man dies in a Singapore jacuzzi when he got stuck on the suction drain. He was found on his stomach. Is anyone else thinking he was trying something very, very naughty with the sucking drain when he got stuck? You know what I'm talking about.

What's one of the things we've learned from these posts over the weeks? Don't mess with old people, right. Well, don't mess with pregnant woman's Christmas decorations either. A pregnant woman in Texas took a baseball bat to a piece of scum who was trying to steal a reindeer from her yard.

I hate PeTA, and here's a perfect example why.

And the runner-up for the Darwin Award is Michael McKean, not the guy from Spinal Tap, of Seminole, Florida. It would appear that Mr. McKean's favorite television show is Barnaby Jones because he likes to drive around pretending he's a police detective. He would drive around in his car that was tricked out to look professional, and warn people over the P.A. system he had installed. Well, Mr. Jones, I mean McKean's luck ran out then he began to tail the wrong car one day. A car with a couple of actual detectives inside.

Now, your all asking yourselves, "Chris, how in the world can it get better than that?' Well, here's how.

The winner of the Darwin Award this week is Vernon Proctor of Sacramento, California. Mr. Proctor is the Assistant Principal at Hiram Johnson High. Here's his story. He walks up to the manager of the motel he was staying in telling him that wanted to file a police report because a woman had just stolen all his valuables. Well, hells bells, I'd want to call the cops as well. But there was a problem. The woman who had robbed him was the prostitute he'd rented for the evening and when police arrived they found Mr. Proctor high as a cat on nip.
Saturday, December 9, 2006

Best Video Game Ever?

If you have an XBOX 360, then go get Gears Of War and kiss the real world goodbye for a few weeks. This is one of the best games ever made. Second only to GTA:SA. Excuse me while I go into my immature fanboy mode. GOW total rules. Awesome graphics, even on my 19" CRT, amazing sound and a freakin' great sense of realism. You really feel like your taking cover and blasting Locust hordes.

Iraq Is Vietnam

We've been hearing for sometime now that Iraq is the new Vietnam. Guess what, they're right.
A Syracuse woman was charged after a Fort Drum soldier accused her of spitting on him without provocation at Hancock International Airport, Syracuse police said.

Lauren Maggi, 35, of 256 Thurber St., was charged with second-degree harassment after the Nov. 22 incident, according to a police report.

Jason Jones, 21, told police a woman he did not know walked up to him near the United Airlines ticket counter, asked him if he was a Fort Drum solider and, when he responded that he was, spat in his face.

A second soldier on the scene supported Jones’ accusation, police said. Maggi offered no explanation for her conduct, police said. She could not be reached for comment tonight.

Friday, December 8, 2006

Friday Funny

Thursday, December 7, 2006

The U.N. Wants To Fund Terrorists

This Was Brought To My Attention By John K

Just when you think the Useless Nations couldn't surprise you any more, they go and want the world to send $450 million to Hamas led Palestine.

They voted the terrorist organization into power, and now they're paying for it and the U.N. wants the world to bail their asses out. Two words for you. Fuck That. Maybe the U.N. could take some of that Blood For Oil money they stole and use it to help.
'Tis the season to be jorry
Fa-Ra-Ra-Ra-Ra Ra-Ra-Ra-Ra
Deck the halls with boughs of horry
Fa-Ra-Ra-Ra-Ra Ra-Ra-Ra-Ra

Pearl Harbor

Well, I was going to put up a post talking about the attack on Pearl Harbor that took place in 1941, but a member of the Wednesday Hero Blogroll has written up a pretty good one himself. Head over and check it out.

Life Lesson's #254 & #98

#254 - If you're going to headbang, be mindful of your neck.

#98 - If you're going to put Christmas decorations up outside,
A) Make sure it's above 18 degrees
B) Make sure the wind isn't blowing in 18 degree weather
Wednesday, December 6, 2006


An update to the video I posted in today's Wednesday Hero post. You can head over to YouTube, leave a comment and he'll be sending those to his son as well.
SFC. Paul Ray Smith
SFC. Paul Ray Smith
33 years old from Tampa, Florida
Bravo Company, 11th Engineer Battalion, 1st Brigade Combat Team, 3rd Infantry Division

April 4, 2003

When you think of the word Hero, SFC. Paul Smith is the person you think about.

On April 4, 2003, Smith was setting up a temporary enemy prisoner of war holding area during the seizure of Saddam International Airport when his unit came under attack.

Smith kept his soldiers focused during the fight while engaging the Iraqi force of around 100 men with his M16, a hand grenade and an AT4 anti-armor weapon.

Smith tossed a grenade over a wall then he climbed atop the armored vehicle. Disregarding personal danger, he sprayed the attacking troops with .50-caliber machine gun fire. According to the Army, he told a soldier who accompanied him to "feed me ammunition whenever you hear the gun get quiet." He fired more than 300 rounds at the enemy before being mortally wounded himself.

For his action on that day, SFC. Smith was posthumously awarded the Medal Of Honor by President Bush,

becoming only the 3,459 serviceman to be awarded the honor since the Civil War.

His "conspicuous gallantry, above and beyond the call of duty," according to his citation, protected the soldiers in his platoon as well as other troops at an aid station nearby.

A father needs our help.

I'm trying to see about also adding email messages for those of us who don't have webcams.

These brave men and women have given their lives so that others may enjoy the freedoms we get to enjoy everyday. For that, I am proud to call them Hero.
We Have Every Right To Dream Heroic Dreams.
Those Who Say That We're In A Time When There Are No Heroes, They Just Don't Know Where To Look

This post is part of the Wednesday Hero Blogroll. If you would like to participate in honoring the brave men and women who serve this great country, you can find out how by clicking here.

Blogs Partcipating In Wednesday Hero

Tuesday, December 5, 2006

An ACLU Christmas Seaonal Celebration

The Young Conservative of Texas have erected an ACLU version of the Nativity Scene. I wonder how long this will stay up before someone bitches that it's offensive to their anti-Christmas views?

Click For Full Size
For the life of me I can't understand why the precious U.N. won't get off their corrupt, bribe taking asses and do something about this madman. I have absolutely no doubt in my mind that had this United Nations been around in the 30's and 40's they would have just sat and watched Hitler while issuing toothless warning after toothless warning.
Sunday, December 3, 2006

Wise Sage Of The Day

"The difficult can be done immediately, the impossible takes a little longer."
Army Corp of Engineers

"Telling the future by looking at the past assumes that conditions remain constant. This is like driving a car by looking in the rearview mirror."
Herb Brody

In Case You Missed It

Before we get started this week, I have to let you know that I think this is the best batch of stories I've posted. All of these people deserved the Darwin Award.

A California man was electrocuted while trying to steal the copper wiring from a vacant building. Hey, copper's can sell for $3+/pound is some areas. So what if I get the shit shocked out of me.

A Colorado man was sentenced to 27 years for breaking into people's homes and asking to smell and lick their feet. That's just nasty right there.

An Arizona man was arrested after he robbed a bank and then proceeded to drive into a building full of police and firefighters. Here's a tip. If the parking lot is full of cop cars, it's probably a good idea to head in that direction after robbing a band.

I think the title of the article says it all. N.Y. Man Accused Of Spray Painting Goats Genitals.

Ever wanted to know the definition of irony? Well this story and this story will pretty well define it for you.

An Australian woman was arrested for biting a cop who was attempting to arrest her for drunk driving. Oh, she also happened to be the wife of the District Court Judge.

A drunk Louisiana priest was arrested for firing a rifle in the air, threatening a store clerk and kicking a deputy in the groin. I couldn't thing of a joke for this one.

The Best Criminal Of All Time.

An man in Ontario, Canada was hit by a train while jogging on the railroad tracks. How do you not hear a train coming. I mean, it's not like it runs silent or something.

Now my favorite part of the program.

The runner up for the Darwin Award is Charles Sibindana from Vereeniging, South Africa. Mr. Sibindana didn't feel like going into work one day so he faked a note from the doctor. Not all that uncommon. But it was the doctor the ailment that set off the warning signs. It seems Mr. Sibindana faked a note from a gynaecologist stating that he was pregnant and needed some time off. I don't think I could add to that even if I wanted to.

And the winners of the Darwin Award are James Walter Quick and Richard Allen Johnson of Lexington, S.C. James and Rich were were sitting around, watching some football, drinking so beer, yep, alcohol was involved, and decided to place a $20 bet on the game. Rich lost and refused to pay. Well, James was understandably upset. I mean, $20 is $20. So he goes to his truck and gets his gun, as any rational man would. He then demands the money. Rich refuses and says, "You can't shoot me, I'm invisible." Guess what, he wasn't.
Friday, December 1, 2006

Random Thoughts: Sweet XVI?

As I was searching through the archives I noticed that my count is wrong on these posts. I call this one 16, but I actually have no idea what number it is. I've missed numbers, doubled some and had some back when I was on Modblog. But I'm going with 16 anyway.

I have become comfortably numb

Forget Crack, Bejeweled and Chuzzle are the most addictive things on the planet

Why do we have that little indentation on our upper lip? And what the hell is it called?

Deep Space Nine rocks

Only 24 days until Christmas

Jesus Done Left Chicago, And He's Bound For New Orleans

I have this one hair that grows under my right eye. Strangest thing I've ever seen

Velveta Rules!!!!

Blonde, Brunette, Redhead? Decisions, decisions, decisions.

Why are men genetically encoded to look at a woman's butt? We could be holding a conversation, a woman will walk by, and without missing a beat we'll keep talking while our eyes look down. Same with breasts.

Circa 1830
rule by elders; specifically :a form of social organization in which a group of old men or a council of elders dominates or exercises control

Why do radio DJ's with the last name Miller have to use the old Miller Time joke?

Why do small t.v. sets have the A/V plugs in the front?

I love classical music.

I hate shaving.

Anyone else remember the show Small Wonder? How about Werewolf?


Why are the burned edges of the lasagna the best part of the lasagna?

My hair has finally started to fill out.

Why does a brand new, fresh from the pack, pair of underwear feel so good?

"Obi-wan never told you what happened to your father."
"He told me enough. He told me you killed him."
"No, I am your father."
"No, it's not true! It's impossible"
"Search your feelings, you know it to be true."

Funny as hell